Charity shall cover the multitude of sins

The title of this post is  a quote from the bible, not that I’ve read the bible particularly, but it’s very, very, true. From those seeking to further or re-ignite a musical career by performing in a charity sing-a-long, or the person recently exposed for general wickedness giving a sizable donation in the hope of forgiveness to outright theft. Charity is not always about being charitable.

With most RL charities you do get some idea of where your moolah is going. Be it from annual events like Comic Relief, or the abandoned dog ‘writing’ to you from the happy dogs home where it is cared for. Of course this information might be complete bullshit, in SL however, where we’re all only who we say we are, it’s harder to be sure that your very real money is going to the right place.

You do find a lot of people asking for donations for various things in SL, be it medical aid or to assist with an electricity bill. Some of these things you want to help with, some of them less so. Not so long ago there was a blog asking for donations to a good cause. To send the bloggers child to a camp, several posts were made over the days, keeping us up to date with the total amount received, dates expected to leave, shopping trips for things to take to camp, promises of photos of the child enjoying the camp and so forth until…. Nothing. Not a sausage more was heard aside from a couple of completely unrelated posts on the blog. But I wanted to know how it went. Did they make all the money and go to the camp? Did they not reach their goal and had to postpone for next year, thus returning all the money to the donors? What was going on?

Now as evil as I feel casting aspersions on something as sensitive as this, this plea for help from this particular person left a sour taste in my mouth. Because it wasn’t the first time they’d been found needy.

It was over a year ago when I first noticed this person, their laptop was unhealthy and such was their plight that they couldn’t play SL anymore. Which, before anyone leaps in with ‘ZOMG, like SL is vital to your life’, SL *is* vital to some peoples lives, so kindly shush. Anyhoo, a sale of their items and inclusion of tip jars at their store was launched in order to garner some cash to go to a repair/new laptop. I’m not sure which. Again, a flurry of posts advertising the sale and asking for help, and again, nothing afterwards. I’d presume they’re got the lappy fixed as four days after the initial breakdown they blogged dancing on cows at an SL party. But no specific mention of a fix was made.

Now I’ve mentioned no names here, although it’s prolly fairly obvious. But believe me, I’d dearly like this person to show me a buttload of photos and say ‘fuck you bitch’ to me, I really would. Cos I hate that SL makes me suspicious like this. But at the same time you really do have to wonder what some peoples needs really are.

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35 Responses to “Charity shall cover the multitude of sins”

  1. ♥JellyBean♥ Says:

    I’m always leery of helping anyone’s charity that has no “accountability”. The only one I ever give to in SL is RFL. I don’t feel that bad for people with broken laptops, kids that need to go to camp, electric bills, etc. I guess that’s because I think “get off SL and take care of yo shit!” That probably makes me a bitch, but at least I’m an honest bitch.

    Awesome post Kitty!

  2. I will not give to a charity or charitable cause in SL. There is no accountability in SL for what they do with the funds that they receive. I believe, I saw on the SL Secrets one Sunday someone admitting they took the charity money and ran.

    If I want to donate to a cause that I feel strongly about and there are many out there that I do, I give RL money to an organization that I know is reputable and honest. You can go to this site to find out if a charity is good or not:

    http://www.charitynavigator.org/

    I know people may slam me for my comment but giving from the heart is good but giving wisely is good also!

  3. Did you ask to see pics? I mean…….is it even possible that this person’s RL illness or other issues might’ve gotten in the way of their ability to update their blog?

    I know the story, and while I respect this person and like them we’re not bosom buddies.

    I just feel like this is a person with a child that is ill. A certain measure of kindness might be in order,after all…

    There but for the Grace of God……..(I thought I’d throw that last bit in since you like the bible.)

    • ♥JellyBean♥ Says:

      @Gidge – thing is… if she were ill, or as you say possibly too ill (which I’m not in the loop too much on the story to even know if she is ill) wouldn’t she of been also too ill to log into SL and post 8 pics of SL stuff? I saw the blog. I just feel as if people who actually contributed to getting her kid to camp should deserve to know how the money was spent that they gave, and that’s what Kitty stated in this post.

      I mean, by looking at the blog it seems to me like the 8 pics & 283 words (I’m a word count nerd) she used could have possibly been 1 pic & less words to give an update? It seems like common courtesy to me. Then again no one held a gun to people telling them they had to give either. An update does seem like a decent thing to do in my opinion.

  4. Hiya Gidge,

    I will admit that I did not ask for pictures, mostly because I never contributed a donation and asking for pictures of other peoples children would make me feel icky.

    Also, yes, I understand about the child and illness, and to be perfectly honest I wouldn’t have even noticed it (in a critical way at least) if it wasn’t for the previous incident with the laptop.

    There are also a multitude of discrepancies surrounding the whole shebang. The blog has been updated, but with no mention at all of the trip, and posts are dated at times when the author has claimed to be unavailable.

    Like I said, I really want my opinion to be proved wrong, if it’s not then this is all levels of nasty. And as much as I like to believe SCD secrets are a crock of shit you really can’t help but wonder.

  5. I agree with Gidge.

    I made a special hair to help her out with the costs.. We aren’t friends, we barely know each other and to date I think we have had all of two conversations. But there is a certain lack of mention of all the charity events she has taken part in for generating money for others as well. I suppose helping someone I don’t really know well could get me labeled as a sucker, but you know honestly I just chose not to believe the worst about everyone in sl, because I can’t imagine what a miserible existence it must be to spend every moment constantly questioning peoples motives.

    To be blatantly honest though, my real question is the same as Gidge’s. Why not simply ask the person first before writing up some nasty diatribe with a tasteless image which is obviously going to hurt the person in question. To me, it seems very much that contrary to your statement that you hope your wrong, you don’t really care, you have already decided and you intended to post this for the drama and hits it can produce otherwise you might have just I dunno…… asked someone for some answers first.

  6. “…and posts are dated at times when the author has claimed to be unavailable.”

    You know what, anyone that matters knows who you’re talking about, so I hope Laynie forgives me for using her name here. Where are these posts that you refer to? I see nothing from Laynie between April 30 and June 29th…

  7. Tiernan Serpentine Says:

    Not to cast aspersions on anyone’s character as that’s being done already. And in all likelihood the requests for donations were genuine and the proceeds were used honestly.

    However, it just does look a bit suspect to someone casually reading the blog posts in question on fashion world of sl that there were four posts regarding the camp trip and then no subsequent mention of it at all. I think that was the point Kitty was making in a blunt fashion. That right now when content creators are paranoid of either being stolen from or accused of theft and charitable events are under scrutiny, it seems highly odd that the person in question had time to blog about lag and rendering anomalies but didn’t feel the need to give an account of money given in good faith.

    In light of previous blog entries requesting money, and while there is no specific suggestion of underhandedness, the whole thing does come across as a bit grasping and manipulative. But then again that is just from an outsider’s perspective and many not be the case at all. But it kind of is the perception put across.

  8. Kitty will slander anyone.. even her alt.. for a story.

    http://slmeangirls.blogspot.com/2007/12/rip-offs.html

    http://slmeangirls.blogspot.com/2007/12/rip-off-fraud-exposed-as-as-bigger-rip.html

    Anything to keep readership up, huh Kitty. How pathetic. And after apologies are made.. you just keep on going as if nothing happened. What a useless waste of free time, it’s just too bad that real people suffer from your drivel.

    Grow up and get a conscience.

    • hawksrock Says:

      Also, just to clarify those posts that you linked in this comment on MeanGirls were a huge satire aimed at a lot of the “undercover” sleuthing that was going on at that time about who was actually making/designing what. It was one of the cleverest ways of tackling the issue that I have read. It was parody at its finest.

  9. hawksrock Says:

    I can honestly say that I know nothing of this story, and therefore don’t have an opinion on it as it relates to this particular instance.

    I will however comment on the fact that I do get extremely tired of seeing all of the requests for individuals needing money. The most common one being that so and so’s livelihood depends on having a laptop and it crashed, and I think to myself that if their livelihood depends on it, and they can’t afford it… then obviously they aren’t getting much of a livelihood from it and therefore it shouldn’t be the end of the world. What my client meant to say was that their cyberaddiction is destroying the little retreat from RL where they can find a modicum of happiness in an otherwise crappy existence, and they REALLY need a new laptop. I know I am a cynic, and sometimes it sucks to see the world as a cynic does.

    On the other hand, if people are dumb enough to send other people money for something silly like that, then I say more power to the people asking for it. I happen to have three kids, who have never attended a stayover camp because, guess what – I can’t afford to send them! lol If y’all wanna send me $1500 a kid, then I would be pretty stoked to send em all to camp on your behalf. 🙂

    • I was person in a position to help and decided to…. I didn’t really think that made me dumb, I had the means and chose to help someone, but if being generous is akin to being stupid I guess thats me, I donate to a lot of different things in both lives.

      Do the people who write for this site really think it was the best idea to write a nasty blog entry without even trying to contact the people involved first? Even tenshi usually contacts people before the blogging mayhem begins. I mean kitty implies someone is screwing people out of money they donated in good faith based on no evidence or investigation then the person posts the pictures and info she was after and now you decide people who helped someone are stupid because you can’t be bothered to read why they might have done it? Seriously?(sorry this question is actually not directed just at hawks, I just can’t be bothered to comment again below)

      • Afterthought Says:

        If people actually read the blogs/posts they would get the meaning of it rather than be irate for an offense not intended.. the point of hawksrock’s post was the silliness of donating for a laptop and him seeing that as a dumb thing to donate to as it is NOT vital to one living and breathing and as a side note he has 3 kids that have never been to camp if their are people being that generous..

        Just as the blog itself became misconstrued because of people not grasping the point the author was making.

  10. I think that way too much time is wasted worrying about how other SL residents chose to spend their lindens. Honestly. If I want to support another person’s gummy bear addiction with my hard-paid-for L$… that’s my perogative. I do, however, find the amount of requests or pleas for financial assistance I see in SL tedious, and frankly am surprised that this topic is so rarely discussed in blogs or within the community.

    But definitely take me with a grain of salt, because I am often donating to whatever. A lot of issues/things strike me or move me and I have donated to sever causes… personal and otherwise.

  11. For what is worth…I’m not going to comment on how or why Kitty did what she did or if how she handled it was wrong or right. It is her blog and she can do whatever she wants in it and suffer the consquences whether good or bad.

    However, I do think this has brought to light a topic (Charities, etc. and accountability) that I think is important to discuss in SL and in the blog community.

    Sometimes, we spend more time discussing fashion and hair instead of what is really important in SL and RL.

  12. Lizzie Lexington Says:

    This makes me think about a project I am taking on in SL. I really want to bring in a couple non-profits for awareness/education of a specific issue that seems to be more common in America than we hope to believe – Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault. But after reading this article it makes me question whether or not I should ask for donations to support these centers or just use my land as more of an info hub for resources and referrals.

    • Perhaps what you can do is put donation boxes out for those that are comfortable with donating in SL and with Lindens and then information out for those that would prefer to donate to the organization in real life with real dollars.

      As you can see by the replies some people don’t mind donating in SL and others prefer to do it in RL.

      Just my two cents….

      • Lizzie Lexington Says:

        ooh yeah good idea. Thanks Terri! This is an issue near and dear to my heart.

  13. Bee Mizser Says:

    It’s so sad that someone didn’t check their facts before publishing. In fact this post should now be removed because of Laynie’s reply or an apology issued by Kitty. An IM or an email to Teagan or Laynie (both of whom I’ve found very approachable) would have resolved this. Instead we have a libellous blog post (and Laynie is quite within her rights to sue your arse Kitty) proven to be total bollocks. This is the first time I’ve visited this blog and it will be the last.

    To quote Laynie…

    “Fuck you, Bitch”

    • Afterthought Says:

      The facts are stated as such.. How do we decide as individuals what causes are worthy? How do we know whats legit? Where is the proof? Then the author proceeded to give an example via someone who has asked for help several times and has never shown proof. As any good writer she used a real EXAMPLE for us to ponder on. Never defaming anyone, leaving names out and inviting response. There is NO legal grounds for anyone to make except Kitty.. as she is now being slandered by these posts trying to defile her character and name.

      Defamation of character can include slander (spoken derogatory statements), libel (written derogatory statements) or both. To constitute actionable defamation, The statements must be false and expose a person to hatred, ridicule or contempt. You also can sue if the defamation harms you in your occupation. to make a successful defamation of character claim, you must show that there was a false statement of fact, this statement was conveyed to a third party and the statement is understood to be about you and tending to harm your reputation. In the case of a public figure, actual malice must also be proved.

      As Kitty used NO name and the article was about charities and how we know that the causes we give to are actually the causes our money is used for there is in fact no leg for anyone to sue her.

      On the other hand all of these people USING Kitty’s name and attacking her character as a writer/person are doing so in malice to harm her reputation.

  14. One of the difficulties in navigating new media is that blogs and blog writers often function like reporters – breaking stories, exposing scams and frauds and the like. However, unlike the old media, many of the bloggers are untrained and either are unaware of the ethical requirement to allow the subject of an article the opportunity to respond before publishing or dont’ care since they can do what they like on their blog. Certainly under blogging rules – which are pretty nonexistent – she is not required to contact the target of her blog post, but if she were a reporter – then she would be required to do so.

    So really, the question is not about her or her story, but about what kind of blog publication SLRevolution intends to be. Because the group of writers that comprise the SLRev could set standards requiring that writers contact the subject before publication and thereby elevate their blog from random ramblngs to something approaching an SL media site, news and opinion reported according to some set of standards – and not ad hoc.

    • Lizzie Lexington Says:

      I was kind of thinking the same thing Cajsa particularly in the way in which she presented the facts then posed questions. It was more like an op/ed piece if you want to look at it from the angle as the post being some form of journalism. I think it would have been the right thing to do to contact Laynie but did she have to? I would say no.

      • And I lean the other way, thinking fair is fair and she should have asked.

        Sure, she did not HAVE to, but she SHOULD have.

        What would be ideal is for SLRevolution (and any other similar site) to have a set of standards in advance – deliberated on and agreed to in advance that include some of the basic such as:
        1) Contact the subject of a story for his/her side.
        2) If some fact can be verified, verify it rather than say I don’t know but I think.

        stuff like that.

      • Lizzie Lexington Says:

        Oh Yeah i totally agree she should have, I would have. I was just meant there is no ruel yet in place that compels her too. And the standards I would say if they want ot go into the direction of say NWN they had to have standards, it all depends how they want their blog to viewed.

  15. Lizzie Lexington Says:

    LOL nice typos Lizzie but for some reason my words didnt all show up on my screen haha

  16. Wow. Lotsa comments. I don’t think I realized there was quit this much firestorm after me.
    Well, for what it’s worth – I agree that blogs are essentially giant op/eds and as such are really open to write about whatever they like.
    There are times when I read SCD that I go “DAMN ! You guys are being HARSH!” and times I truly disagree with them.
    I suppose that’s healthy discourse.
    And just because I think it would’ve been more appropriate to say “hey what’s up with this?” directly to the person, doesn’t mean the blog writer was compelled to do so.
    For what it’s worth – I once bought hair so whatsername could give her dog an operation. I forget her name. Hair designer. Sinsation I think.

    I dunno what happened to the dog. I hope the dog was ok.

    Maybe I’m a sucker, maybe I’m not. But I don’t feel bad about buying hair so she could help her dog.

    It’s not any different from any RL biz having a sale to help cover their expenses. I know people who own private businesses who run special promotions specifically for personal things – and they’ll say so. No one quizzes them “How are johnny’s braces?” They just take advantage of the sale.

    I dunno. I’m really saying much am I? I guess that I was just surprised to find something written like this on SLRevolution. I’ve never caught this to be you guys style is all.

    If so, salut. I’ll add you to my list of high drama reads.

  17. This pertaining blog is provocation and exploitation at it’s worst. You should have asked the woman about the camp and perhaps all could have been handled with a few IM’s. But as most SL/ Fashion/ Gossip blogs, it is all about sensationalism and reader base.

    However I can’t agree with the woman and her ” fuck you blog” neither. She is revolting, downright despicable and someone posting pics of their kids is very strange in my opinion.

    There should have never been a blog about asking SL residents to send her kid to a camp, atleast not a public ( keep it within close SL friends ) request. When it comes to family/ rl et al – keep this shit out of SL!
    I can’t even imagine how her kid/teenager must feel to take ” pics of proof ” to show the rest of the world ” how he has gotten his payed camp trip. Freaking embarressing for a Teen!

    And a ” fuck you ” follow up blog, where she uses her kid in the same sentence – some isn’t right with that woman. Illness, forgetfullness whatever.
    However if there is a sick child involved, there are agencies in the real world who have donation funds set up for low income and/ or parents with any sort of dissability.

    The internet is a wonderful medium, but don’t use your RL issues as an excuse to send a minor to some camp.

    Who knows, maybe she did use the money for herself and some agency indeed payed for that very trip. No one knows and me personally I careless.

    But use some dignity when it comes to your RL family!

    Noor~

  18. Noor/Whatever Name you are using today needs to go back to the rock she crawled out from under and stick to lists.

    Kitty invited this woman to tell her fuck you and she took her up on the offer.

    I donated to the cause because I read the blog and the notecard. It clearly stated the camp was free but the transportation to get there(several states away) and basic items needed for the camp were not. I am glad there are so many educated people in this world that learned to read.

    I agree with the other commenters that Kitty should apologize to this woman.

  19. […] Charity shall cover the multitude of sins « The SL Revolution […]

  20. Afterthought Says:

    I’m reading this article..nodding in agreement.. praising the author for leaving names out… scroll down..read comments..

    I have to say you people blow me the fuck away!
    I would have never known who this article was referring to had it not been for you outraged hypocrites.
    The author uses an actual situation as an example of “is this real” “how do we know” “wheres the gratitude/proof of where our monies gone” still naming no name. You people throw the name out there as if it boosts your social position because you”know” her..you DON’T know her.. you know of her. She showed proof? really? I looked..I see no date saying he attended this year just her word stating “kiddo says this year was the best”.. <-not an exact quote. So how do we know they are from this year? On her say so? How do we know that's her son? On her say so? How do we know she's ill? On her say so? The point I got from this article was NOT lets bash this woman for asking (after all the author never mentioned a name, YOU did).. but everything online is taken with a grain of salt and these days everyone has their hand out..how do we know whats real or not? How do we as individuals decide whats a good cause to give to.. after all the only credibility with anyone online is ON THEIR SAY SO. There is no proof..even with RFL.. people can copy bot, who's to say they can't script a forged kiosk? You give out of goodness..brownie point.. social "look it I did that" status.. atonement..what ever your reasons..you had a reason to do so.. but are you actually giving to the cause you believed you were?

    Bash and down me as you will..gasp the injustice of my doubts.. pfft..you don't know me or my circumstances of doubt.. maybe just maybe I'm down on my luck dying slowly in silence with no hope of surviving no matter how much money is "handed" to me via generosity of others..
    or maybe I'm bitter and just hate everyone..Or maybe I can just see everything from other points of view and found injustice in the round up the posse and string her up attitude of previous comments.. you'll never know..because.. well. I say so.

  21. ♥JellyBean♥ Says:

    @Afterthought I believe you said it best. Kudos.

  22. Could not help but see that not only do you beg for a laptop but now to send your son to camp. Also noticed the car you took him to camp with is rather new. Remembering my parents who when times were hard my father took to mowing lawns and painting houses after his full time job, not to send us to camp but to make ends meet. The thought of asking others to do what in most peoples life is not a necessity but a luxury is in itself a shameful act, shame on you and your family. Some people have pride and some have no shame. If your illness is so severe then there is social security disability, those who don’t qualify may still be sick but it does not stop you from being employed, it’s hard but it appears begging has become easier and for you a way of life. And your son looks able enough to work to get his camping trip, even if he is mentally challenged there are bag boys who work at supermarkets, good life training to become responsible adults, if he’s too young I delivered newspapers at 13. The point is you have made yourself a charity case where you feel a sleep away camp is a child’s right not something that not everyone can afford. And begging is a way to get what you think you deserve. Some poor parenting in action.

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